Saturday, November 27, 2010

10 Things that Piss Me Off

1.  People that try to make themselves look good by making others look word...karma.

2.  That I have no hips...I must pull my pants up a thousand times a day...I may have velcro implanted to keep them in place.

3.  That the media thinks we are so stupid that they have to provide us with an opinion...I mean really, news casters are just actors that aren't smart enough to remember a script !!!

4.  Childproof caps....urghhhhh

5.  The person that uses the last paper on the roll...and doesn't tell anyone

6.  The fuzz that gets in my's not even the same color as my shirt...where does it come from?

7.  When the thought is so crystal clear in my mind but when I say it, the person hearing it gets a completely different message :-(

8.  That coffee doesn't taste anything like it smells

9.  That random women do not recognize the sexiness oozing from my pores ;-)

10.  That the chances of me becoming Grand Pubah of the I can fix 1-9 above...are getting slimmer every day!


Jess said...

I'm with you on 1,3,4,5 and 7.

I don't get bellybutton fuzz.....maybe it's the type of material your shirts are??

I only wear spandex and leather ;P

Sandra said...

You are so funny! I am so glad your daughter was pimpin' you out! I shall be back for more laughs!

Mynx said...

the worst thing about belly button fluff is getting it stuck to your tongue. eww.

The Empress said...

Here is to you becoming Grand Pubah 'cause the world could do with a whole bunch of fixing. Speaking of which, could you please sort those annoying, pesky sales clerks out that stalk shoppers around the stores?

Bouncin' Barb said...

Dad you are funny!!! The best one by far is #3. I get so fired up when these people have to put their 2 cents in. I've told Bruce that I could gladly give my opinion and get paid too but why can't I find a job like that? Great post.

Dad said... the cause of science, I think you should send me a selection of photos of you in spandex and leather for close scientific is imperative for the good of mankind that we solve the bellybutton lint mystery!

@Sandra...thanks....does that make me like a blog whore???

@Mynx...OK, let me explain this process one more time...first, you blow on the naval to get rid of the lint...then you insert tongue ;-)

@Empress...I'll add it to the list once I'm elected!

@Barb...thanks...I actually quit watching the news years ago because I got tired of the media telling me what I should think about every given issue

Jumble Mash said...

Hahahahaha awesome list. I don't get belly button lint. I think its a guy thing. Also, I can give you some of my hips if you'd like. I think I have plenty to share.

becca said...

hahah i now know where JM gets her sense of humor and as for the belly button lint it is quite entrtaining to a 10yr old who insists on picking it our and showinf everyone what he has found. keep the post coming we love them.

Dad said...

@becca...10 or 50...some things will always amuse a male :-)

Aimee said...

OMG I love #3... Actors that arent smart enough to memorize their scripts lol. Love it!

Krissy said...

Dad... The fact that you recognize or even thought to consider #8 in your previous list makes you sexy in my book! :) Calling you "Dad" while saying that.. is a little creepy.

Dad said...

@Aimee...I think the only qualifications for a newscaster is good diction and nice hair!

@Krissy....if you think I'm sexy I'll answer to anything you're comfortable with ;-) But I really can't figure out the coffee smell/taste ting...doesn't make sense!!!

Krissy said...

@Random Dad... I meant on your prior list where you said you were thankful for never having to use a tampon. How thoughtful of you! :) Most guys wouldn't even consider that idea, so yes that makes you sexy to me!

Dad said...'s kinda weird, I live alone in this big ol' house but I have pads, tampons, and Midol...cause I have three lovely daughters :-) LOL...I actually use Midol as a stocking stuffer for the girls!

Krissy said...

@Random Dad... What a considerate and smart Dad and man you are! My father had four girls and he never did that. Although, he was always smart enough to hide chocolate for when we needed it.

Dad said...

@Krissy...chocolate...good idea!